Yes, we actually exist. And yes, we have a slip number, because nothing says “legit business” like being able to point at a dock and say, “That’s ours.”
📍 Our Location
Slip #C‑44 — Nepean Sailing Club
3259 Carling Avenue
Ottawa, Ontario K2H 1A6
📧 Email
Railmeatapparel@gmail.com
(We check it. Eventually)
Ahoy there, landlubbers and seasoned mariners alike. Look, we know you’re itching to get your hands on some fresh Rail Meat Apparel, and we’re just as excited to get it to you.
But unless you’ve figured out how to teleport (and if you have, please email us immediately—we have questions), we have to rely on the traditional method: ships, trucks, and the occasional overworked carrier pigeon.
Here’s the lowdown on how your gear gets from our deck to yours.
⚓ The Logistics (Or: How We Keep the Boat Afloat)
We’ve teamed up with the crew at Printful to handle the heavy lifting. Think of them as our trusty first mates who actually know how to fold things.
• Processing: Your order usually takes 2–7 business days to get printed, packed, and prepped. We call this the "anticipation phase." It’s like waiting for the wind to pick up, but with more coffee.
🌊 Shipping Times (US Waters)
• Standard Shipping: 5–7 business days. Perfect for those who appreciate the slow, scenic route.
• Express Shipping: 2–3 business days. For when you absolutely, positively need to look better than everyone else at the yacht club by Friday.
🌎 International Voyages
We ship worldwide because style shouldn’t stop at the horizon. Most international orders arrive in 7–14 business days, though local customs officers occasionally like to admire our work for a few extra days. We can't blame them.
⚓ Returns & Exchanges (The "No Regrets" Policy)
If your gear arrives and it’s not love at first sight—or if it fits like a sail on a rowboat—don’t panic. We want you happy, mostly because unhappy sailors are prone to mutiny, and we just had the floors waxed.
The Rules of Engagement:
• Contact us within 30 days of delivery.
• Items must be unworn, unwashed, and in original condition. Basically, if it smells like a wet dog or a three-day regatta, we can’t take it back.
• Defective or Damaged? If your gear arrives looking like it fought a kraken and lost, we’ll replace it for free. Our bad.
• Standard Returns: If you just changed your mind, shipping costs are on you. Think of it as a small tribute to the sea gods.
• Refunds: Once we receive your return, we’ll process your refund in 5–7 business days.
⚓ Signal For Help
Need to track a package? Got a question about sizing? Just want to tell us a really good sea shanty?
Drop us a line at RailMeatApparel@gmail.com. Be sure to include your order number so we can find your info faster than a shark smells chum. We’ll get back to you promptly, or at least as soon as we find our reading glasses.
LEGAL DISCLAIMER:
By purchasing, wearing, or even briefly glancing at Railmeat Apparel, you acknowledge and accept the following legally non‑binding, spiritually chaotic conditions:
